Articles by: Cassidy Pen
For a long time, it was believed that God gave people a given level of abstinence and there was nothing anyone could to to prevent the sinful lust impulses that lead to masturbation. Scientists at Brother Lonnie University or Faith Facts (B.L.U.F.F.) through a grant awarded by the Foundation for […]
Safford, Arizona – Brother Lonnie’s University of FaithFacts (B.L.U.F.F.) has announced a special safari and big game hunting excursion to the African Nation of Zimbabwe. Special Services Recreational Director and long-time B.L.U.F.F. elder Thomas Downey announced the trip during a closed question-and-answer session between the B.L.U.F.F. Eldership and SMN Pledges […]
Jeanne Phillips, who writes the “Dear Abby” column, has come out as a self-rapist and proponent of the Satanic lifestyle as pushed on society by agents of Big Masturbation. In her latest column, Ms. Phillips comforted a despondent, guilt riddled masturbator, Her advice included the statement, “…masturbation is normal. It […]
Diogo Dias Cortérro (1460-1525) A Spirited man of a rock-solid Christian foundation, Diogo Dias Cortérro was much more than an explorer during the Age of European Expansion. Cortérro was born in Vigo, Spain to a devout couple within the moral confines of wedlock (1460). His early years were spent in […]
BEDFORD NY-Veteran actor/comedian Chevy Chase, 71, has been arrested and charged with aggravated felching by Bedford Police after allegedly getting down on his knees and forcing an oral purge of his juices from an unidentified fornication partner. According to a statement released by the Westchester County sheriff’s office, Chase, whose […]
B.L.U.F.F. SAFFORD AZ – Mobile phones and devices have become an increasing fixture in American life during the last decade or two. It seems that a person can go nowhere without finding citizens fiddling away with their noses in a cellular phone or tablet electronic device. Pastors and Ministers have […]
New Zealand is a volcanic mass in the middle of the sea lying east of the Island nation of Austria. It has been proven that the earthquake and natural disasters which formed New Zealand were the point from which devils burst through the earth in the demonic ascension, one of […]
SMN Safford, AZ-As kids flock to the latest Hollywood Blockbuster, Mad Max-Fury Road, a disturbing parental alert has been issued by the Faith Advisory Parental Media Information and Liturgical Foundation (FAPMILF), the anti-masturbation in media arm of Brother Lonnie’s University of Faith Facts (B.L.U.F.F.). Various hidden pro masturbation messages have […]
Safford, AZ – For years, the Stop Masturbation Now! Ministries has warned of and demonstrated the evils of Masturbation. The absolute harm done when one inflicts self rape activity on his or her soul when finger dancing the skin flute or spelunking the sin cave is incontrovertible, but still, agents […]
BREAKING MASTURBATION NEWS!!! KANSAS CITY MO – League officials and Representatives of the Jackson County Board of Health are investigating claims that high concentrations of masturbation particulates were found on hot dogs sold by the Kauffman Stadium concession. Arrowmark Industries denies the charges that extensive amounts of semen microbes and […]
