Dear Lonnie: I have a question/confession I would like to reveal. I’m not sure how best to start so here it goes; my friends and I were having the usual college girl sleepover. A couple drinks into the sleepover somehow my friends and I started comparing breast size. Now, I […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—Prom night is as American as Apple Pie, the 4th of July or Baseball. It is a tradition, a right of youth and for many the night when they become an adult. People look forward their whole teen lives to prom night. The fancy clothes, a limousine, dinner, the dance, […]
HISTORY-SMNNN Throughout the 8,400 years man and the entire world has existed, many nations rose from self-sin, and shamed creation, and rightfully so, became extinct. Here is a list of the top five cultures of people to extinct from masturbation: 5) SOME CHINESERS China, largest nation in the Ornament, is […]
SMN Safford, AZ-As kids flock to the latest Hollywood Blockbuster, Mad Max-Fury Road, a disturbing parental alert has been issued by the Faith Advisory Parental Media Information and Liturgical Foundation (FAPMILF), the anti-masturbation in media arm of Brother Lonnie’s University of Faith Facts (B.L.U.F.F.). Various hidden pro masturbation messages have […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—Most music since the 1930’s and FDR has promoted masturbation. However 50 years ago today the greatest anti-masturbation song of all time was released. Meat Loafs I would do anything for love but I won’t do that (Masturbate) was the first pop song that dealt with masturbation and the need […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)— Doctor Lonnie Childs, founder and leader of Stop Masturbation Now Industries, recently wrapped up an unprecedented 3 day conference with ISIS leaders. Hosted in Winnipeg Manitoba the “Winnipeg Summit” as it is now called focused on several topics including the price of oil, dangers of masturbation, and limiting the […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—It is no secret that liberals hate morals, family values and children. However liberals love homosexuality, perversions, and masturbation, especially when it comes to kids. Here is photo evidence of the liberals “love” for your children. Parents: Talk to your kids about self rape before its too late.
Lonnie Childs received great news over the weekend when the Graham County Juvenile Detention Center in Safford, Arizona delivered the results of a three-month study on the effectiveness of the Anti-Masturbation Strait Jacket®. According to spokesman Dennis E. Cross of the GCJDC, “We found Mr. Childs’s jackets were of great benefit to […]
Today’s post is a half tribute to my mom, Carol Zimmermann, and half in response to emails I received this week. Over and over, people have been asking me the same question: “As a Christian, how should I treat my mother?” To answer this question I took all the Bible […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—Many old wives tales are not correct. But did you know many of these tales have some fundamental basis that has lost its true meaning over the years? One of these is masturbation causes blindness. Many people laugh off this tale as a unsubstantiated claim made by schoolchildren. However it […]
