We’ve all heard the old saying, “Cleanliness is next to Lonnieliness.”. I am going to walk you through the simple steps that I take to properly wash my female form in the shower. It’s so simple that even the most dullest of sexes can comprehend (that means “understand”)! First, I like […]
Hear that sound? That’s the sound of Satan accepting a new victim into his realm. Michael Hutchinson, lead singer of British death metal band INXS, died recently due to masturbation-related complications. From an outsider’s perspective Michael seemed to have a fulfilling yet wild life. He had money, fame and respect. […]
We all know that masturbation advocates claim that Masturbation is “natural” and they back-up that claim by saying that Animals do it. This statement is false, to a certain degree. Most animals do not masturbate, as it is a completely unnatural act. Unfortunately, some animals do masturbate. These same animals […]
It’s easy to get discouraged in the fight against masturbation. Big Masturbation and its allies for years have been undermining the moral fabric of this country through the schools, Hollywood, the LIEberal media and sports. Today marks a turning point in our struggle. International black baseballing super star Sammy Sosa […]
“What happened last night? Did I get selfraped? Who do I turn to?” Turn to Christ, young masturbator! Take the STOP Masturbation NOW pledge of self-celibacy today! Praise!
The Faith Facts are in. Masturbation epidemic is swiping the planet, and no one is safe. It doesn’t care if you’re foreign or normal, woman or man, black or rich. A one hit wonder Rock-n-Roll singer Freddie Mercury has learned this lesson firsthand. At the height of his musical career, Freddie […]
Hortonville WI/ Safford AZ (SMNNN) The annual Beat Pigs For Jesus Festival in Hortonville, Wisconsin, has been cancelled, no doubt because of pressure from liberal atheist gays. The festival, a long standing holy-ceremony, in which faithful Normals beat the life from disgusting pigs, was protested by known liberal homogay beastophilia […]
SMN -My dear friends in Christ. As you are well aware, the fight against the sin of self rape is an ongoing process, one that is never finished. The holy bible, being the first and only needed reference on the topic of morality, contains certain instructions and responsibilities that Christian […]
With it being “back to school” season, a terrifying new trend is making parents take notice. It has been a growing problem for high school athletes to use “performance enhancing drugs” to get an edge at various sports, however, now non-athletic masturbators are finding value in anabolic steroids. Young deviants, […]
Typically, when lazy Hollywood filmmakers need something shocking to add to their film, they’ll add explosions, kill off one of their actors or introduce fake characters via digital technology. More refined filmmakers have been known to prey on the fears of morality by including shocking sexual and masturbatory scenes in their […]
