Family Values

Tina’s Law and Your Tax Dollars at Work

Tina’s Law and Your Tax Dollars at Work

As fellow Christians and believers in Brother Lonnie’s divinity you are well aware that South Dakota recently passed Tina’s Law which bans masturbation and dangerous interracial coupling. Many of the naysayers have asked how can you enforce such a law and our answer has always been the Council of Morality […]

Rachel Evans

Parents put 16 year old Girl up for Adoption after Catching her Masturbating

(StopMasturbationNOW)—.An East Carolina couple have made national news by being the first parents to put their child up for adoption due to masturbation. 16 Year old Rachel Evans admitted to masturbating to a lesbian scene in a penthouse branded magazine she had “borrowed” while babysitting. Usually parents give up their […]

by September 16, 2014 66 comments Family Values, Morals, Trending
The Sperm Bank: Satan’s Clone Factory

The Sperm Bank: Satan’s Clone Factory

A story has been circulating the Worldwide Web about an extreme masturbator, Zheng Gang, died committing the sin of masturbation while on the premises of a sperm bank. It seemed like the proper time to expose the horror know as the “sperm bank”. Your average “sperm bank” is a Obama […]

Product Review: Palmolive Dish Soap

Product Review: Palmolive Dish Soap

  In older, more savage days, women often used masturbation as a way to keep their hands looking good. These women of yesteryear would insert their hands into their sin-zone as a way to moisturize their hands after washing dishes. After all, nobody wanted “Dish Pan Hands” in those days. […]

by September 15, 2014 2 comments Family Values
A Button-down Appointed Spouse…

A Button-down Appointed Spouse…

Brother Lonald explains to his followers, The need for Christianity to be at the forefront of preventing self-rape and other flesh sins is apparent. The devil seeks to destroy your soul by breaking down your human structure. Satan knows that a human being built with Jesus as the foundation is […]

by September 15, 2014 6 comments Family Values
Apple Wearables Event Sparks Anti-Masturbation App & Device Rumors

Apple Wearables Event Sparks Anti-Masturbation App & Device Rumors

News of today’s Apple iPhone event has brought the continued speculation that the Cupertino based electronics giant also plans to unveil a “wearable” device. Apple fanatics have dubbed the proposed wearable the “iWatch” but so far Apple itself has not confirmed such a device will be unveiled at their “9-9-2014” […]

by September 9, 2014 3 comments Family Values, Lifestyle, Trending
Do Not Take The Bad AIDS Challenge

Do Not Take The Bad AIDS Challenge

“Our prayers will heal the damage to your soul from life of masturbation, but only time will heal your vagina.” – Brother Doug Pinnic The fact that masturbation gives you the Gay, is basic Faith Science. And if we learned anything from Tom Cruise’s movie “Philadelphia”, is that unlike famous basketball […]

The Latest in Anti-Masturbation Technology for Children

The Latest in Anti-Masturbation Technology for Children

It has come to our attention that some of the lesser of our followers are a tad squeamish using the Anti-Masturbation Cross® on their children. While Brother Lonnie and God will deal with you eventually, in the meantime the Faithscientists at Brother Lonnie’s University of Faithfacts (B.L.U.F.F.)  have come up […]

by September 6, 2014 30 comments Family Values
New Report: John Denver Crashed Aircraft While Masturbating

New Report: John Denver Crashed Aircraft While Masturbating

PACIFIC GROVE,CALIF. — This week, forensic investigators announced that 53-year old singer-songwriter John Denver lost control of his light aircraft while masturbating, causing the plane to crash into Monterey Bay, Calif. 17 years ago. The case, which had been closed several years ago following an inconclusive investigation of Denver’s airplane […]

"My true happiness will be when I can free myself from  self rape and have a Same Race Normal Superior Sex Male Husband to think for me" -Krista

THE WOMAN WHO THINKS REDUCING THE MALE MASTURBATER POPULATION BY 90 PERCENT WILL SOLVE EVERYTHING

By TheRev Leroy Jenkins The Femitheist is a 22-year-old criminology student with a three-year-old. One angry day in 2012 she took to the Internet to outline the brutal concept of International Mastubater Castration Day. After posting it on YouTube she stepped out for a coffee. Returning home a few hours […]

Help Stop Masturbation Now!
Get the latest content first.
We respect your privacy.