Science

What Girls Masturbate to Compared to Guys May Shock you (Photos)

What Girls Masturbate to Compared to Guys May Shock you (Photos)

(StopMasturbationNow)—Some pornography is more obvious than others. If you see two girls enjoying a buck cake you are definitely watching pornography. But parents did you know that your daughter looking at cat photos on myspace could be just as bad or worse? Recent studys show more girls masturbate to pictures of […]

by January 28, 2015 25 comments Science, Self-Rape Prevention
Top Five Animals In Danger Of Extinction Due To Masturbation

Top Five Animals In Danger Of Extinction Due To Masturbation

THE ENVIRONMENT- (SMNNN) Masturbation, and the dreaded Masturbation Residue Film Particles (MRFPs) endanger all living things, but some animal and species are in danger of going the way of the Great Normal Rhinoceros and the giraffe, and becoming extinct from masturbation. Here is a list of the most endangered animals: […]

by November 17, 2014 6 comments Death, Science, Supernatural Disaster, World
Which Minority is Destroying America?

Which Minority is Destroying America?

We need to come up with a Final Solution for this minority. Praise!

by October 29, 2014 3 comments Science
Study: Masturbation is Directly Related to Lower Wages

Study: Masturbation is Directly Related to Lower Wages

(Stop Masturbation Now)—A new study just released by the foundation for a better tomorrow shows a direct correlation between masturbation and lower wages in America. A two year federally funded study of six thousand Americans across various races, ages and genders was completed in which they looked at average wages […]

by October 21, 2014 18 comments Money, Science
Inanimate Object Rape Intesifies as EbolAIDS Becomes Airborne

Inanimate Object Rape Intesifies as EbolAIDS Becomes Airborne

SEATTLE WA/ WALPOLE MA- (SMNNN) Faithscientists suspect EbolAIDS, the most dangerous masturbation-spread and homogayest of diseases, has possibly become airborne, as they predicted it would, following two cases of inanimate object rape, a sexual act so disgusting it would require one to be in the fatal stages of the Airborne […]

Ebola Mutation Transmitted via Masturbation

Ebola Mutation Transmitted via Masturbation

The Foundation For a Better Tomorrow in association with B.L.U.F.F. has confirmed that a new super strain of Ebola is passed to hosts through masturbation. The virus clings to the outer skin palettes and is launched airborne at the moment of masturbatory climactic release, becoming airborne and susceptible to transmission […]

by October 12, 2014 8 comments Science
MRFP at 100X magnifications

EbolAIDS Outbreak Begins

The Gulf Region USA- Somewhere in Africa or maybe Asia- (SMNNN) Officials at B.L.U.F.F. microorganism/viral weaponry division, and the at least one capable person at The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow, have declared the the dreaded homogay-induced virus Bad AIDS has mutated, and become the gay upon the proven masturbatory […]

by October 10, 2014 15 comments Animals, Science, Supernatural Disaster, World
Young Woman Develops Ability to Masturbate to Orgasm with Thought Alone

Young Woman Develops Ability to Masturbate to Orgasm with Thought Alone

(StopMasturbationNOW)— As if female masturbation wasn’t scary enough. It seems a young woman has developed the ability to make herself orgasm without any physical interaction. 22 year old Boel Franklin of Centerville Tennessee has come forward recently to demonstrate the ability to orgasm almost at will and only by thought. […]

by October 7, 2014 6 comments Celebrity, Science
Pioneers in Anti-Masturbation, Episode Two: Neil Armstrong

Pioneers in Anti-Masturbation, Episode Two: Neil Armstrong

HISTORY (SMNNN) Welcome once more to our serial series of great Pioneers in Anti-Masturbation! Today, we showcase Lunar Spacestronaut Neil Armstrong, first man to leave the flat disc of the Earth, and set human foot upon the Moon. In the 1940s or some time about there, Young Neil grew up […]

by September 26, 2014 13 comments Celebrity, History, Lexicon, Lifestyle, Science
John Harvey Kellogg, respected anti-masturbationist, sane  and regulated Normal.

Pioneers In Anti-Masturbation, Episode One

Preventing masturbation is a cause that has been championed throughout history by many great normals. Among the outstanding members of this fraternity of morality and decency, one man stuck out like a sore-thumb, and eventually, rose to become the cream of the crop of medical anti-masturbation. I speak of none […]

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